Anything but Usual...

Today is Saturday
The Sun is shining
It's 11am 
People are;
doing laundry
having brunch
getting ready to go to the mall
The usual?
Well, Sarah is being buried 
today
at 25...


She was my mate in High School. Bunked next to me in Form One. My mum never ceased asking of her especially after my cousin passed from sickle cell because Sarah had it too.
She fought valiantly and had a smile even in her pain that re-assured you when she was the one in pain.
Against the odds, 
She finished high school
finished Uni
seemed to be getting stronger each day
took ill
gone
at 25...

She has probably been buried already, time difference and all

I’m sitting here looking out my window, beautiful day. People going about their usual business. And yet it’s anything but usual for the people who have to bury or lose their loves ones today.

More importantly, It’s anything but usual for those who never got to see today. RIP Sarah!

For God and Country...

Today is memorial day and there's this story that wont give me rest until I write it. It was inspired by a 19 year old boy who wanted to become an army surgeon and died on his first assignment, the summer before he was to start college. Here goes...

Scott Smith Snr. shoveled the first bit of earth onto Scott Smith Jnr.'s coffin as the minister continued to recite a passage from the book of prayer. He wiped his sleeve over his brow as if to get rid of sweat but everybody saw it for the camouflage it was, for it was barely 30 degrees Fahrenheit and many who had been deceived by the early morning sun and had not dressed warmly were visibly shivering.

Everybody pretended not to notice, though. When an ex-marine, who had forgotten more gruesome deaths than the most ardent horror movie aficionado can see in a lifetime, cries at death, you let him be because it is a pain you can never begin to imagine.

So we all watched in deafening silence as his 6 ft 5 inches brawny frame heaved with the racking sobs he was trying rather unsuccessfully to suppress. After an uncomfortably long minute, he gave up all semblance of being in control and sat on the edge of the dug grave, thanking his stars he had not opted to be in uniform that day. 

He picked up the high school diploma that had been placed on the coffin and said... "Class valedictorian, 4.0 GPA, so many dreams, bright future ahead, today, I bury my son. And as saddened as I am that I have lost a son, what is choking my words with sobs is pride. I'm proud of the young man who did not look at all the promises and possibilities of a life spent pursuing personal gain, but was prepared to, and indeed gave it all up, for God and country. God bless you, son. And God bless America"

I promise you couldn't have picked my jaw from the ground with a heavy duty crane. To say I was stunned is the understatement of understatements. Patriotism and duty took on new meaning for me. And as someone broke into the American National anthem, I closed my eyes and began to pray... thanking God for the men and women who risk it all for God and country; so that the rest of us could have the freedom to pursue whatever dream we desire... in freedom.

My mind came home to Ghana and I thought how I never really valued the armed forces, especially since the most exposed I got to them was on my television set during the Independence Day Parade. Oh, and during UN peace keeping missions. However, the fact that today (God forbid), should our country be attacked by land, air or sea, they would place themselves in a position to die to protect the rest of us, is commendable.

So as the US remembers it's valiant fallen heroes, I'm thinking of patriotism and duty. I remember this famous quote "I only regret that I have but one life to lose for my country" (Nathan Hale) and the anecdote about a woman who lost a husband and both sons to the war and yet when interviewed said she only regretted she did not have more sons to give to the cause of the war.  

Can you make that sacrifice, can you give up yourself or loved ones up, or God and country?

When the sea and roads become thirsty for Blood...

Easter is here. In Ghana, this is mega Chilling time. From para-gliding on the Kwahu mountains to beaches being choked with 'picnickers' on Easter Monday, it's a time to de-stress and make merry, often forgetting what we are commemorating. I lie?

As we celebrate the most precious gift there is, the gift of eternal life through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, let's pause and think of those who lose their lives every year as we celebrate this LIFE*

Every year, too many people die in accidents at Christmas & Easter. It's really unfortunate; especially the 'preventable' ones.

It's sad when you hear a young person is dead. It's sadder when you ask for the cause of death and are told drunk-driving & you feel any sympathy people may have had disappear. I bet it's hard to be sympathetic when traces of cocaine in the nostrils and alcohol on the breath are the first things to greet you when you get to an accident scene. Especially when you're a poiceman or coroner and have seen enough wasted youth to last you several lifetimes.

True, it will not be on your obituary because we are Africans and do not speak ill of the dead. But rest assured everyone who makes it to the funeral or asks after you and their family and friends will know. After all, we had our own wireless telephone systems way before cellphones came into their own and no one will say it but many will think it; what a waste of youth! It's just like he/she committed willful suicide.

I wonder whether they tell the parents when they call... "We will need you to come over and identify a body we suspect may be your son/daughter. It was a car accident... but we wont be sure of the cause of death till after the autopsy. The amounts of alcohol and narcotics found in his/her blood stream were lethal" God help the parent who has to take that call!!! Please don't make your loved ones have to go through that.

If u're drunk, stay put! Don't put the bottle to your own head & pull the trigger. If you're high, stay put. That is not the time to show your Michael Phelps skills in the sea or your NASCAR skills on the potholed roads. And if u don't drink, etc. Please dont get in a car with a someone who is clearly out of it. sure, your friend loves u, but He/she isnt the one driving at that moment. 

My schoolmate lost a sister on Tuesday. She was sober. It didn't matter. The drunk-driver made it and should be discharged Today. I'm not saying he should have died... I'm just stating she didn't live.

So as you go a-chilling this Easter, please don't have an accident or drown at the beach because you were drunk. God forbid that it happen! I pray no one crashes nor drowns... But if it must, don't let it be by your own hand. Don't be reckless with life as we celebrate the gift of life..

What's up for #EASTER ? Kwahu mountains? While para-gliding, look at the amazing scenery and acknowledge the gift we commemorate. Salvation!

We know we will all go one day. WHEN & HOW you'll go is, for the most part, out of your control. At least make sure you know WHERE u'll go... It's where you'll spend the rest of time. Don't leave your destination to chance.

What Helps you through Grief?

When we lost Serwah in 2005, I became thoroughly acquainted with Cece Winan's 'Comforter'. I would put it on repeat and pray and cry my my questions and turmoil out to God. I was talking to my friend during that period and as I asked 'God, why?' one more time, she asked me, 'Who fathoms the eternal thought?' 


She was reminding me of one of my favourite Methodist hymns which helped me immensely in high school when my Grandpa passed away. I'd had it on repeat on my 'voicebox' then. As we broke into song together, I felt comfort sweep over my soul. 


The hymn is MHB 513 and I have posted the lyrics below. Since Monday when I heard the news about my grandma, I haven't stopped singing this hymn nor playing 'Comforter'. What helps you in times of sorrow/grief?  Kindly share your go-to scripture, music, quotes, etc. that help you overcome times of grief.


1. Who fathoms the eternal thought?
Who talks of scheme and plan?
The Lord is God! He needeth not
The poor device of man.

2. I see the wrong that round me lies,
I feel the guilt within;
I hear, with groan and travail-cries,
The world confess its sin.

3. Here in the maddening maze of things,
When tossed by storm and flood,
To one fixed ground my spirit clings;
I know that God is good!

4. I long for household voices gone,
For vanished smiles I long:
But God hath led my dear ones on,
And He can do no wrong.

5. I know not what the future hath
Of marvel or surprise,
Assured alone that life and death
His mercy underlies.

6. And if my heart and flesh are weak
To bear an untried pain,
The bruised reed He will not break,
But strengthen and sustain.

7. No offering of my own I have,
Nor works my faith to prove;
I can but give the gifts He gave,
And plead His love for love.

8. And so beside the silent sea
I wait the muffled oar;
No harm from Him can come to me
On ocean or on shore.

9. I know not where His islands lift
Their fronded palms in air;
I only know I cannot drift
Beyond His love and care. 

The Icy-Handed, Unwelcome Visitor (Thief)

Death is never funny but here I am wishing, ten days after April fool's day, that my brother will apologize and say that it was a joke. Although It would be in very bad taste, I'd be too happy and relieved to scold him.

Even after confirmation from my mom, the news has still not sunk in... How can it? It's like being told the sun will not rise tomorrow. I am still very much tempted to call her phone to see if she would pick up and tell me it was just a dream... but equally scared that she won't pick up and I'd be forced to face the reality that she's really gone.

Something has fallen in my eyes, as is said in Akan, but tears are refusing to fall to clear that which has fallen onto my eyeballs. Who is dead? You may be wondering. If I said my grandma, it wouldn't be an accurate description... for she was more. 

Related by the blood of Christ more than anything else, this woman was my grandma, intercessor, advisor, you just name it. A mother to my mother for all the years I've been alive. Yet death, with impunity, just snatched her away this morning... I am sad... and I am angry... but mostly sad...

My only comfort is that she has gone to be with the Lord... May her soul rest in peace!

About that, I just have to ask... Will your family have that comfort when you're gone? I've been thinking a lot about this. Death has this way of punching you in the solar plexus with a reminder of the life hereafter... 

I believe it causes you to think even when you're an atheist or agnostic or say you do not care. For no one has come back to confirm that indeed this life is all there is, and religion is indeed 'rubbish' What if there's more?

Whilst we have life, we still have a chance to decide... Please think about it. After here, what next... And yes, if you ask me, I recommend Jesus...